Home for me is definitely where I was born and spent the majority of my formative years. Even though I have lived all over the world and mny US states, home is only and always the South Carolina Lowcountry. Our kids were born in several different states as we moved a lot during their growing up years, so they never really could nail down a place to call home. So, I would always tell them that even though they may have been born elsewhere, their roots and therefore, home, is South Carolina.
That's similar to my perspective too. Home is Ottawa, Canada. I've not moved around much, but I've had the good fortune to travel a fair amount and I've been exposed to lots of cultures and practices. I love to visit other places, but I always want to come home.
What is your idea of home? Is it the place you were born, or where you’ve lived for the majority of your life? Or is it defined by something else completely? I’d love to know.
This is beautiful, Noha. I love your line about making new memories where old ones live.
I was born I to a military family and moved every two to four years and when I’m asked where I’m from, I always struggle to answer. I lived where I was born for 3 weeks, I was in Germany for most of my developmental years, and I created a life and love and family in Ottawa. And it’s so important to me to give my kids the opportunity to create memories and live where they can continue to be reminded of them.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and your beautiful turns of phrases ❤️
I’m so glad you enjoyed it, Jen. Yes, I remember you saying you moved constantly as a child of a military family but I didn’t realize that you only lived where you were born for 3 weeks.
Ottawa to me is a great place to raise a family, whatever else its shortcomings
"..I know the answer is as simple as my love of memories, my love of making new ones where the old ones live".
This is profound my sister.
"What is your idea of home?" for a born refugee like me; “home” has always been a transition state, where you land, build, live, then move on to the next “home”. It is like you always have a second chance to make it right; then you move on to the next chance, and repeat…😊
Your answer is both brave and beautiful, but that ‘and repeat’ at the end is worrisome to me 😂😂😂
Mostly because it means you may find another home and another home and never come ‘home’ to our home - I think I can’t possibly understand the strength of a born refugee, even if I am a third culture kid. Thanks for commenting and being here.
I was born in Douala, Cameroon (the place where my heritage and roots are), and then lived in Paris, Bordeaux (my longest stop and city that embodies my teenage years), Reims, Douala again, Bordeaux again, Bologna, Munich, London, and now Putignano in Italy. So if I had to define home it would be the place where my heart is. For people, like me, who lived in many places it is hard to call one place home. Rather than home, all the places I lived represent memories, growth, experiences, things I love(d) and hate(d). Right now, Putignano is home because it is a place where I am finding myself again, while discovering new things about Italy I didn't know.
When I read your text, I thought about my little brother who is the one who always stays whereas I am the one who is constantly moving. I felt your words about crying when your sisters left because it is exactly how my brother is, even more so than he is now a father, and desires that I have a deep bond with my nephew and niece.
Oh @emmanuelle, my heart really does feel for your brother! I know that when my sisters tell me something they love or something they've discovered about a new place they are, or when they feel "at home" in a new place, I'm happy for them but a little piece of me grieves at the thought of them getting further and further away, or staying away longer because they're finding themselves in the other places. It's taken me years to make peace with the fact that we won't all be together all the time, that we can stay close while our lives stretch to cover a wider circumference.
Do you remember at what point home changed to your current "home"? When you first moved, did it become home right away? I'm so fascinated by these questions because my life took a different trajectory and I was never very far from Ottawa. Even in Montreal, Ottawa still felt like home, even when Montreal grew on me and became familiar.
It does take a while for a new place to become home, because it takes a while for it to become your new familiar, compared to your previous home. But I find that developing familiarity is mostly a factor of time, so if you wait long enough, it will become your new familiar, even if yiu still miss your previous home.What also really helps make it familiar is also making new friendships, especially close ones.
First, home is my body. It is an internal feeling. Am I me ? Do I feel safe in myself and my close vicinity ?
Only then can I feel home in spaces where I can wholefully expand and express myself.
Hence home can be anyplace, anywhere; I will always have me. Glad to be flexible.
That's beautiful...
Home for me is definitely where I was born and spent the majority of my formative years. Even though I have lived all over the world and mny US states, home is only and always the South Carolina Lowcountry. Our kids were born in several different states as we moved a lot during their growing up years, so they never really could nail down a place to call home. So, I would always tell them that even though they may have been born elsewhere, their roots and therefore, home, is South Carolina.
That's similar to my perspective too. Home is Ottawa, Canada. I've not moved around much, but I've had the good fortune to travel a fair amount and I've been exposed to lots of cultures and practices. I love to visit other places, but I always want to come home.
What is your idea of home? Is it the place you were born, or where you’ve lived for the majority of your life? Or is it defined by something else completely? I’d love to know.
Wow, That was deeeeeeeeeeep
{and amazing}
This is beautiful, Noha. I love your line about making new memories where old ones live.
I was born I to a military family and moved every two to four years and when I’m asked where I’m from, I always struggle to answer. I lived where I was born for 3 weeks, I was in Germany for most of my developmental years, and I created a life and love and family in Ottawa. And it’s so important to me to give my kids the opportunity to create memories and live where they can continue to be reminded of them.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and your beautiful turns of phrases ❤️
I’m so glad you enjoyed it, Jen. Yes, I remember you saying you moved constantly as a child of a military family but I didn’t realize that you only lived where you were born for 3 weeks.
Ottawa to me is a great place to raise a family, whatever else its shortcomings
Loving this as a sister who moved away and misses home and family very much.
I’m so glad it resonated with you, and I’m so glad to have found another sister on here. Looking forward to exploring your writing and get to know you
Thanks. Same!
"..I know the answer is as simple as my love of memories, my love of making new ones where the old ones live".
This is profound my sister.
"What is your idea of home?" for a born refugee like me; “home” has always been a transition state, where you land, build, live, then move on to the next “home”. It is like you always have a second chance to make it right; then you move on to the next chance, and repeat…😊
Your answer is both brave and beautiful, but that ‘and repeat’ at the end is worrisome to me 😂😂😂
Mostly because it means you may find another home and another home and never come ‘home’ to our home - I think I can’t possibly understand the strength of a born refugee, even if I am a third culture kid. Thanks for commenting and being here.
I was born in Douala, Cameroon (the place where my heritage and roots are), and then lived in Paris, Bordeaux (my longest stop and city that embodies my teenage years), Reims, Douala again, Bordeaux again, Bologna, Munich, London, and now Putignano in Italy. So if I had to define home it would be the place where my heart is. For people, like me, who lived in many places it is hard to call one place home. Rather than home, all the places I lived represent memories, growth, experiences, things I love(d) and hate(d). Right now, Putignano is home because it is a place where I am finding myself again, while discovering new things about Italy I didn't know.
When I read your text, I thought about my little brother who is the one who always stays whereas I am the one who is constantly moving. I felt your words about crying when your sisters left because it is exactly how my brother is, even more so than he is now a father, and desires that I have a deep bond with my nephew and niece.
Oh @emmanuelle, my heart really does feel for your brother! I know that when my sisters tell me something they love or something they've discovered about a new place they are, or when they feel "at home" in a new place, I'm happy for them but a little piece of me grieves at the thought of them getting further and further away, or staying away longer because they're finding themselves in the other places. It's taken me years to make peace with the fact that we won't all be together all the time, that we can stay close while our lives stretch to cover a wider circumference.
To me home is where I happen to be now, but it is also where I feel the most familiar. Such a touching piece...
Do you remember at what point home changed to your current "home"? When you first moved, did it become home right away? I'm so fascinated by these questions because my life took a different trajectory and I was never very far from Ottawa. Even in Montreal, Ottawa still felt like home, even when Montreal grew on me and became familiar.
It does take a while for a new place to become home, because it takes a while for it to become your new familiar, compared to your previous home. But I find that developing familiarity is mostly a factor of time, so if you wait long enough, it will become your new familiar, even if yiu still miss your previous home.What also really helps make it familiar is also making new friendships, especially close ones.
That makes sense. When I left Montreal, even though I was so glad to come back to Ottawa, I missed certain things and people a lot.