I don't know how anyone can look away from such gut-wrenching, preventable, massive human suffering. Knowing that this is happening far away, while I go about my daily life of privilege and comfort, is indeed a cognitive split that makes the world feel brittle and terrible, even as I'm grateful for being with those I love. Thank you for writing about it so well.
Thank you so much for sharing this with us, for your open heart, and for prompting thoughts of gratitude. I'm carrying this message of 'not looking away' with me too.
I'm truly sorry for the anguish you're experiencing, which I know is about the pain and suffering experienced by others. I hope you can continue to find some solace in quiet, personal moments (with your children and with Bilbo) and in words of comfort from people like Dr. Imam Omar Suleiman.
I'm here again, reading this, and went to click the love button and realized I have already. I needed it again today the same I needed it months ago. Thank you, Noha.
This is so what I need to be reading right now. My brain is split too. I am so grateful for JVP. My partner is Jewish and he and his grown kids and I have been protesting. And it fades back a little and we all get on with it. Meetings, lunch dates, shopping for jeans. Then we return and face it. Really try to see what is happening. Write our representatives. It all disappears into....what? Is there there nothing we can do? Thank you for the kinship through these words.
Camille, you have warmed my heart with this response. JVP, If Not Now, and other orgs like them give me a bit of hope when it all feels so hopeless. Have you read this writer? Also speaking out and actually traveled to the West Bank to document what is happening: https://infinitejaz.substack.com/p/you-dont-understand-how-bad-it-is
I think we have to continue speaking out, protesting, calling, all of it. The powers that be are counting on our eventual exhaustion, learned helplessness, and apathy. It will take a long time but change will have to come. This is untenable. Much love and solidarity to you and yours
Sometimes all we can do is indeed bear witness, watch the unthinkable as it happens, because being there in and with our humanity is the only thing we can do over and over again. I still have to believe that anything wholesome, even in the shape of a thought or a hope, will encourage more good.
I saw a post on insta about a man who protested every day during Vietnam , and a reporter asked him if he thought this could actually make a difference. His response was that he wasn’t protesting to change the government. He was protesting so the atrocities didn’t change him and he didn’t become desensitized to them.
This is a beautiful reflection, Noha. I have to say my favorite part was learning that you have a Rabbit named Bilbo 🥹🥹 the Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings are some of the best stories of all time.
Thanks so much, Sam. I totally agree about Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit. We've actually watched Lord of the Rings with Bilbo on our lap, and she looked like she enjoyed it 😃
I am with you 💯. Everything is heavier, darker, more pressing yet tenuous. The images are devastating. You don’t want to see but feel you can’t look away. You want to see because you want to know what is happening but it is a dark spiral. You can’t believe the mainstream narratives, you find sanity and comfort in brave, truthful, lone voices. I channel my righteous anger and anxious energy into writing, hoping it might make a difference. May God help us all. Thank you for sharing. ❤️
Grace, thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot to sit in this space where it feels so lonely, and to look around and see others who are with us. Even if we're all in pain and bewilderment, at least we're in it together.
Dr. Imam Omar Suleiman said something amazing I had not heard before, or considered before, in his sermon on Capitol Hill. He pointed out that the word Shaheed literally means "witness" in Arabic, in that this person who has been killed will witness God's generosity and love and mercy, but also that that person who has been killed will be a witness of the crime that was committed against them, will stand before God and say "this was done to me." Even if the world looks away and refuses to acknowledge, the witness's testimony will be enough. It broke my heart open.
Oh Noha I am so glad to hear you write about this! I saw a woman on instagram do a video about how she doesn't like the "martyr" translation because the word does mean "witness", which has such a different meaning and connotation, especially because "martyr" implies that death is voluntary in some way, that a person chooses to sacrifice themself for a cause, which definitely is not the reality in genocide. When I saw the video I did not know the word in Arabic. I appreciate your illumination of the language and Islam, what you say also about witnessing God's generosity and also standing before God as a witness to atrocity. Thank you for this.
Anne-Marie, thank you thank you thank you for bringing me back to this piece months later. Your comment got me to click here again and reread it and realize that I'm back in the same headspace. I've been struggling for weeks. All sorts of wonderful things are happening in my life right now on a micro level, and I have just been up and down, emotionally heavy heavy heavy.
You're so right about the word witness and the lack of choice for so many, and yet the incredible mercy and reward they will still gain from God for all their patience. I like to think of the ones who made choices too: The doctor's and other medics who stayed with their patients when the army moved in and told them to leave the patients behind to die, who refused and then died for it. The journalists who risked (and sometimes lost) their lives to show us the level of the atrocities. I think about the unbelievable bravery of those people and I have to believe that God will reward them immensely. And that their testimony will be worth everything.
YES, Noha! I was thinking as I wrote that, that many people have also made the conscious choice to stay and risk death, and have died, for that great cause of care. I appreciate that you expressed it so well. I see that choice being made in Gaza and in places all over the world. I am learning from Maya elders and wisdom keepers in Guatemala right now, too, and they share about people who will risk their life to save a forest or a lake from mining corporations, because they remember that they are one person and that the Earth herself, and the next generations, are more important. As you say, that is incredible bravery. Thank you for writing. I'm really glad you found a respite in your words, a remedy for the heavy. and I'm happy for the wonderful things in your life, too!
Yes, and we ourselves will all be witnesses as to what we see and experience, and what those in power - or those around us - do and fail to do. At our education nonprofit, The Usuli Institute, Dr. Khaled Abou El Fadl calls Muslim countries and Muslim "leaders" to account during our weekly virtual khutbahs and other events - for example, the "Guardians of the Two Holy Sites" could stop the genocide immediately by cutting off fuel supplies to the West. But they don't. Aside from all the other atrocities they commit, their silence and inaction are especially unforgivable. We have done a lot of powerful programming on Palestine that you might find comforting and insightful. :)
Just discovered your blog Noha -you could add to your gratitude list your ability to articulate feelings, thoughts people have that they are unable to articulate -Am not gd at this, so like to find someone who can -this for example: 'fragmented, fractured, is more accurate. The different pieces are simultaneously in conflict, but cut-off enough that they can ignore each other. I am all of these things at once: heartbroken, hopeless, hopeful, numb, angry, hurt, apathetic' -reading your article + your comments in the replys I felt choked up, heart heavy....bucked up- your gratitudes were uplifting ...ye're Bilbo reminds me of our Chihuahuas, they unknowingly give us such joy, amusement and comfort...another level of cruelty for palastinians being genocided/tortured by Israel (and they're enablers/supporters) losing the pets they love 😞 🫂 to you and all your beloved 💕
You are so brave I suppose you have no choice. How can I really understand not living in war. Your writing is truth and you can still see the good and innocence a child kicking a ball. War it’s everyone’s son’s daughter mother father. Wars are senseless and yet you keep your faith. My family mother father brothers myself have all suffered well I have one older brother alive now. I can’t keep my faith. I just want everyone to love and respect each other. We don’t seem to have evolved. All this suffering can we not all respect each others faith. Everyone should have a place to live enough to eat education healthcare. I find all this suffering in the world so hard. You are a remarkable strong loving woman keep on writing.
I don't know how anyone can look away from such gut-wrenching, preventable, massive human suffering. Knowing that this is happening far away, while I go about my daily life of privilege and comfort, is indeed a cognitive split that makes the world feel brittle and terrible, even as I'm grateful for being with those I love. Thank you for writing about it so well.
Jen! Thank you so much for sharing your perspective, and for bearing witness
Thank you so much for sharing this with us, for your open heart, and for prompting thoughts of gratitude. I'm carrying this message of 'not looking away' with me too.
You're so very welcome. I'm so glad to be finding more souls to commune with on this pain. It makes the difficulty easier to handle together.
Exactly. Your writing and others’ is also allowing safe space to speak vulnerably which is everything we need. Take care 🤍
Noha,
I'm truly sorry for the anguish you're experiencing, which I know is about the pain and suffering experienced by others. I hope you can continue to find some solace in quiet, personal moments (with your children and with Bilbo) and in words of comfort from people like Dr. Imam Omar Suleiman.
Best,
David
Thank you, David. Your care and compassion means a lot.
I'm here again, reading this, and went to click the love button and realized I have already. I needed it again today the same I needed it months ago. Thank you, Noha.
Thank you, Libby. I wish I could say I'm glad we still need it, but I'm not. Solidarity and love.
This is so what I need to be reading right now. My brain is split too. I am so grateful for JVP. My partner is Jewish and he and his grown kids and I have been protesting. And it fades back a little and we all get on with it. Meetings, lunch dates, shopping for jeans. Then we return and face it. Really try to see what is happening. Write our representatives. It all disappears into....what? Is there there nothing we can do? Thank you for the kinship through these words.
Camille, you have warmed my heart with this response. JVP, If Not Now, and other orgs like them give me a bit of hope when it all feels so hopeless. Have you read this writer? Also speaking out and actually traveled to the West Bank to document what is happening: https://infinitejaz.substack.com/p/you-dont-understand-how-bad-it-is
I think we have to continue speaking out, protesting, calling, all of it. The powers that be are counting on our eventual exhaustion, learned helplessness, and apathy. It will take a long time but change will have to come. This is untenable. Much love and solidarity to you and yours
I didn't know this substack, thank you. I won't stop speaking out. It's just so crushing. So heinous. But I won't lose hope.
Sometimes all we can do is indeed bear witness, watch the unthinkable as it happens, because being there in and with our humanity is the only thing we can do over and over again. I still have to believe that anything wholesome, even in the shape of a thought or a hope, will encourage more good.
I saw a post on insta about a man who protested every day during Vietnam , and a reporter asked him if he thought this could actually make a difference. His response was that he wasn’t protesting to change the government. He was protesting so the atrocities didn’t change him and he didn’t become desensitized to them.
Oof, yes. This lands. And I'm grateful for all the ways we CAN do something, and how the caring is what makes us human.
Such a poignant position, thank you Noha.
This is a beautiful reflection, Noha. I have to say my favorite part was learning that you have a Rabbit named Bilbo 🥹🥹 the Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings are some of the best stories of all time.
Thanks so much, Sam. I totally agree about Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit. We've actually watched Lord of the Rings with Bilbo on our lap, and she looked like she enjoyed it 😃
I am with you 💯. Everything is heavier, darker, more pressing yet tenuous. The images are devastating. You don’t want to see but feel you can’t look away. You want to see because you want to know what is happening but it is a dark spiral. You can’t believe the mainstream narratives, you find sanity and comfort in brave, truthful, lone voices. I channel my righteous anger and anxious energy into writing, hoping it might make a difference. May God help us all. Thank you for sharing. ❤️
Grace, thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot to sit in this space where it feels so lonely, and to look around and see others who are with us. Even if we're all in pain and bewilderment, at least we're in it together.
Dr. Imam Omar Suleiman said something amazing I had not heard before, or considered before, in his sermon on Capitol Hill. He pointed out that the word Shaheed literally means "witness" in Arabic, in that this person who has been killed will witness God's generosity and love and mercy, but also that that person who has been killed will be a witness of the crime that was committed against them, will stand before God and say "this was done to me." Even if the world looks away and refuses to acknowledge, the witness's testimony will be enough. It broke my heart open.
Oh Noha I am so glad to hear you write about this! I saw a woman on instagram do a video about how she doesn't like the "martyr" translation because the word does mean "witness", which has such a different meaning and connotation, especially because "martyr" implies that death is voluntary in some way, that a person chooses to sacrifice themself for a cause, which definitely is not the reality in genocide. When I saw the video I did not know the word in Arabic. I appreciate your illumination of the language and Islam, what you say also about witnessing God's generosity and also standing before God as a witness to atrocity. Thank you for this.
Anne-Marie, thank you thank you thank you for bringing me back to this piece months later. Your comment got me to click here again and reread it and realize that I'm back in the same headspace. I've been struggling for weeks. All sorts of wonderful things are happening in my life right now on a micro level, and I have just been up and down, emotionally heavy heavy heavy.
You're so right about the word witness and the lack of choice for so many, and yet the incredible mercy and reward they will still gain from God for all their patience. I like to think of the ones who made choices too: The doctor's and other medics who stayed with their patients when the army moved in and told them to leave the patients behind to die, who refused and then died for it. The journalists who risked (and sometimes lost) their lives to show us the level of the atrocities. I think about the unbelievable bravery of those people and I have to believe that God will reward them immensely. And that their testimony will be worth everything.
YES, Noha! I was thinking as I wrote that, that many people have also made the conscious choice to stay and risk death, and have died, for that great cause of care. I appreciate that you expressed it so well. I see that choice being made in Gaza and in places all over the world. I am learning from Maya elders and wisdom keepers in Guatemala right now, too, and they share about people who will risk their life to save a forest or a lake from mining corporations, because they remember that they are one person and that the Earth herself, and the next generations, are more important. As you say, that is incredible bravery. Thank you for writing. I'm really glad you found a respite in your words, a remedy for the heavy. and I'm happy for the wonderful things in your life, too!
Yes, and we ourselves will all be witnesses as to what we see and experience, and what those in power - or those around us - do and fail to do. At our education nonprofit, The Usuli Institute, Dr. Khaled Abou El Fadl calls Muslim countries and Muslim "leaders" to account during our weekly virtual khutbahs and other events - for example, the "Guardians of the Two Holy Sites" could stop the genocide immediately by cutting off fuel supplies to the West. But they don't. Aside from all the other atrocities they commit, their silence and inaction are especially unforgivable. We have done a lot of powerful programming on Palestine that you might find comforting and insightful. :)
Just discovered your blog Noha -you could add to your gratitude list your ability to articulate feelings, thoughts people have that they are unable to articulate -Am not gd at this, so like to find someone who can -this for example: 'fragmented, fractured, is more accurate. The different pieces are simultaneously in conflict, but cut-off enough that they can ignore each other. I am all of these things at once: heartbroken, hopeless, hopeful, numb, angry, hurt, apathetic' -reading your article + your comments in the replys I felt choked up, heart heavy....bucked up- your gratitudes were uplifting ...ye're Bilbo reminds me of our Chihuahuas, they unknowingly give us such joy, amusement and comfort...another level of cruelty for palastinians being genocided/tortured by Israel (and they're enablers/supporters) losing the pets they love 😞 🫂 to you and all your beloved 💕
You are so brave I suppose you have no choice. How can I really understand not living in war. Your writing is truth and you can still see the good and innocence a child kicking a ball. War it’s everyone’s son’s daughter mother father. Wars are senseless and yet you keep your faith. My family mother father brothers myself have all suffered well I have one older brother alive now. I can’t keep my faith. I just want everyone to love and respect each other. We don’t seem to have evolved. All this suffering can we not all respect each others faith. Everyone should have a place to live enough to eat education healthcare. I find all this suffering in the world so hard. You are a remarkable strong loving woman keep on writing.