Oh dear a slight hiccup I did not foresee in my writing of that line heheheh... perhaps we should simply agree that middle age is everything from 40 to 75? Or I step back from the ledge lol.
Actually have you seen Nate Bargatze's bit about being 42 and thinking he's the same as the 25 year olds? It's hilarious...
I gotta tell you, Mike, when I wrote this post I did not expect this line to be the one that would trigger the conversation 😂😂😂😂... It also seems that Mikes and Michaels are particularly sensitive to this thinking heheheh...
You've just reminded me of this great bit in a Trevor Noah comedy special where he talks about how old everything in Scotland is.
"How old do you think this building is? 400 years old!!!
How old do you think that building is, 700 years old!!!
How old do you think my son is? 300 years old!!! It's that amazing Scottish Workmanship" 😂😂😂
Noha, congratulations on getting your piece published in WAYF. That’s so exciting! Also, I didn’t know you were contemplating writing a book, but you can count on my pre-order when the time comes. Your writing is poignant and moves my soul.
Honored to have my comment mentioned here to, and to have played some small part in helping you let go of that guilt. Thank you for sharing that story in the first place - that took guts. So many of us obviously could relate!
Amy, thank you so much! The WAYF piece was super exciting and I hope it's an indication that I can push through and write the book (I practically have the whole thing written in my head lol but I just need to actually sit down and type it out, which is always the kicker 😅😅😂)
I am so grateful to have you hear reading and commenting and be in conversation together. I have a writer friend named Jen and we used to write together during the pandemic (over zoom) and at the end of our sessions I would always want to share my writing and she would never want to share her writing. I joked once that for me, the process of writing isn't done until I have a reader. It's like that riddle about the tree falling in the forest, but if no one hears it, did it make a sound? If Noha writes but no one reads it, did she even write?
All this to say your reading and exchanging and sharing, and the conversation we have after means so much to me. And you really did help me process. I couldn't believe how much I was still carrying from that situation, and how much better I feel having written it and had those subsequent conversations.
Literally named my whole substack after the need to be seen trying. Why did I used to think it was so shameful, so earnest, so embarrassing? There's a real freedom in doing what we want-- out loud. Publicly. It still scares me, but my skin is definitely a little thicker and my spiritual cardiovascular system is stronger than it used to be. I read a great piece yesterday, (lined below) which affirmed that we need to do hard things. We need to do them out loud. It's terrifying, but it gives us such a sense of agency. There's comfort in building our own competency, step by step, post by post. Keep going!
Even the whole take on being earnest, I wonder about? I think I'm actually a very very earnest person, but I hide it behind this facade of "sure it would be nice if my wildest dreams came true but if they don't it's totally fine, whatever." *shrug*
Which, like, nope, that's not how I actually feel at all.
I think you're right about the need for doing hard things and for naming them. True happiness comes from having a sense of meaning in your life more than it comes from a hundred dopamine hits.
I started reading the article - there's a line or two near the top about how material comfort leading to spiritual discomfort and I was like, YESSSS this is so so true. There are at least 5 different teachings of Prophet Muhammad about this.
D's been doing hard things lately too (my eldest) and I've been watching him come to terms with his own self-efficacy as he builds it. It's so gratifying, and motivating. I'm gonna keep going too.
Love this round-up, Noha! Especially this nugget: "there are enough of us who want writing that chooses to humanize rather than demonize." Yes, that's what keeps me going too.
Noha, this is a beautiful celebratory round up and I am so delighted to hear what all is shifting for you! And like Amy said, so grateful to have been a part of any help you received. I am in awe of the power of writing and sharing and the growth that comes from us putting our hearts and words together to care about each other. Thank you for this generous and generative space to participate in the “project of aliveness” as one of my mentors Simone Seol calls it! Much love and many blessings to you!
Thank you always, Anne-Marie, and I love the sound of the "project of aliveness". It captures the sense of what it is to get through this life trying to be conscious and present, not only on auto-pilot, so well!
I like it, too, Noha! The word aliveness has been coming to me also so I loved when I heard Simone say it, too. It feels like a really full, active version of life!
Thanks for rounding up all your updates and sharing your heart. I appreciate it, as always. And as a fellow lover of cheese, that meme was perfect and illuminating! <3
Awww, you're welcome Emmy. And thank you for the sweet words.
I am eating a salad with feta cheese on it right now lol... I spent years being ashamed of my love of cheese. I moralized it in some bizarre way that was probably related to some disordered eating I was overcoming in my teens and twenties (I do wonder if there are any girls of my generation (growing up in the 90s) who DIDN'T deal with disordered eating lol)... Now I just enjoy it. One of life's small pleasures. Why not?
I heard once that it’s easier to give up chocolate than cheese! Now how they studied that I don’t know, and I’m a super chocolate AND cheese fan and don’t wish to give up either. So, here’s me not adding much to the conversation, but cheers to eating and living well!!! May all our human and more than human kin everywhere be blessed with the opportunity to do so! ❤️
I am obsessed with both chocolate and cheese, but as I've gotten older I've found that the intensity of my love for cheese is now higher than that of my love for chocolate. I do wonder if anyone has studied this lol... My savoury tastebuds are more pushy about what they want 🤣🤣
My friend, we are in the same generational boat and I feel you. Proud of us for somehow, kind of, making it through and reclaiming what we love. My bio literally reads "I firmly believe that a day without eating cheese is like a night without stars, dull and unfulfilling." Here's to that!
Oh, that's exactly it! I've been feeling slightly off-rhythm too, but couldn't put my finger on it. Post-Ramadan hangover makes perfect sense. Take care and thanks for naming what I was experiencing!
41 is NOT middle-aged. That's because 61 is middle-aged and anyone who disagrees will be BLOCKED IMMEDIATELY! 😎
Oh dear a slight hiccup I did not foresee in my writing of that line heheheh... perhaps we should simply agree that middle age is everything from 40 to 75? Or I step back from the ledge lol.
Actually have you seen Nate Bargatze's bit about being 42 and thinking he's the same as the 25 year olds? It's hilarious...
Well, I think of myself as being in my twenties. Only MUCH smarter.
MUCH smarter.
But back then, thinner, more flexible, more hair, no colonoscopies... LOL
Agreed!!!
At 53, I absolutely agree, Michael:).
61 is NOT middle-aged. That's because 250 is middle-aged and anyone who disagrees will be BLOCKED IMMEDIATELY!
- Mike, Highlander
I gotta tell you, Mike, when I wrote this post I did not expect this line to be the one that would trigger the conversation 😂😂😂😂... It also seems that Mikes and Michaels are particularly sensitive to this thinking heheheh...
You've just reminded me of this great bit in a Trevor Noah comedy special where he talks about how old everything in Scotland is.
"How old do you think this building is? 400 years old!!!
How old do you think that building is, 700 years old!!!
How old do you think my son is? 300 years old!!! It's that amazing Scottish Workmanship" 😂😂😂
Noha, congratulations on getting your piece published in WAYF. That’s so exciting! Also, I didn’t know you were contemplating writing a book, but you can count on my pre-order when the time comes. Your writing is poignant and moves my soul.
Honored to have my comment mentioned here to, and to have played some small part in helping you let go of that guilt. Thank you for sharing that story in the first place - that took guts. So many of us obviously could relate!
Amy, thank you so much! The WAYF piece was super exciting and I hope it's an indication that I can push through and write the book (I practically have the whole thing written in my head lol but I just need to actually sit down and type it out, which is always the kicker 😅😅😂)
I am so grateful to have you hear reading and commenting and be in conversation together. I have a writer friend named Jen and we used to write together during the pandemic (over zoom) and at the end of our sessions I would always want to share my writing and she would never want to share her writing. I joked once that for me, the process of writing isn't done until I have a reader. It's like that riddle about the tree falling in the forest, but if no one hears it, did it make a sound? If Noha writes but no one reads it, did she even write?
All this to say your reading and exchanging and sharing, and the conversation we have after means so much to me. And you really did help me process. I couldn't believe how much I was still carrying from that situation, and how much better I feel having written it and had those subsequent conversations.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Literally named my whole substack after the need to be seen trying. Why did I used to think it was so shameful, so earnest, so embarrassing? There's a real freedom in doing what we want-- out loud. Publicly. It still scares me, but my skin is definitely a little thicker and my spiritual cardiovascular system is stronger than it used to be. I read a great piece yesterday, (lined below) which affirmed that we need to do hard things. We need to do them out loud. It's terrifying, but it gives us such a sense of agency. There's comfort in building our own competency, step by step, post by post. Keep going!
https://poeticoutlaws.substack.com/p/the-comfortable-life-is-killing-you
Even the whole take on being earnest, I wonder about? I think I'm actually a very very earnest person, but I hide it behind this facade of "sure it would be nice if my wildest dreams came true but if they don't it's totally fine, whatever." *shrug*
Which, like, nope, that's not how I actually feel at all.
I think you're right about the need for doing hard things and for naming them. True happiness comes from having a sense of meaning in your life more than it comes from a hundred dopamine hits.
I started reading the article - there's a line or two near the top about how material comfort leading to spiritual discomfort and I was like, YESSSS this is so so true. There are at least 5 different teachings of Prophet Muhammad about this.
D's been doing hard things lately too (my eldest) and I've been watching him come to terms with his own self-efficacy as he builds it. It's so gratifying, and motivating. I'm gonna keep going too.
Love this round-up, Noha! Especially this nugget: "there are enough of us who want writing that chooses to humanize rather than demonize." Yes, that's what keeps me going too.
And that’s why we’re kindred spirits 🥰🥰🥰
Noha, this is a beautiful celebratory round up and I am so delighted to hear what all is shifting for you! And like Amy said, so grateful to have been a part of any help you received. I am in awe of the power of writing and sharing and the growth that comes from us putting our hearts and words together to care about each other. Thank you for this generous and generative space to participate in the “project of aliveness” as one of my mentors Simone Seol calls it! Much love and many blessings to you!
Thank you always, Anne-Marie, and I love the sound of the "project of aliveness". It captures the sense of what it is to get through this life trying to be conscious and present, not only on auto-pilot, so well!
I like it, too, Noha! The word aliveness has been coming to me also so I loved when I heard Simone say it, too. It feels like a really full, active version of life!
Thanks for rounding up all your updates and sharing your heart. I appreciate it, as always. And as a fellow lover of cheese, that meme was perfect and illuminating! <3
Awww, you're welcome Emmy. And thank you for the sweet words.
I am eating a salad with feta cheese on it right now lol... I spent years being ashamed of my love of cheese. I moralized it in some bizarre way that was probably related to some disordered eating I was overcoming in my teens and twenties (I do wonder if there are any girls of my generation (growing up in the 90s) who DIDN'T deal with disordered eating lol)... Now I just enjoy it. One of life's small pleasures. Why not?
I heard once that it’s easier to give up chocolate than cheese! Now how they studied that I don’t know, and I’m a super chocolate AND cheese fan and don’t wish to give up either. So, here’s me not adding much to the conversation, but cheers to eating and living well!!! May all our human and more than human kin everywhere be blessed with the opportunity to do so! ❤️
I am obsessed with both chocolate and cheese, but as I've gotten older I've found that the intensity of my love for cheese is now higher than that of my love for chocolate. I do wonder if anyone has studied this lol... My savoury tastebuds are more pushy about what they want 🤣🤣
lol a study in this would be delightful! I’d want to participate! Love that your savory buds are leading… 😋
My friend, we are in the same generational boat and I feel you. Proud of us for somehow, kind of, making it through and reclaiming what we love. My bio literally reads "I firmly believe that a day without eating cheese is like a night without stars, dull and unfulfilling." Here's to that!
OMG I just went to look at your bio and I'm dying!!! I love this so much. What a mess they fed us with all that anorexic chic nonsense.
Oh, that's exactly it! I've been feeling slightly off-rhythm too, but couldn't put my finger on it. Post-Ramadan hangover makes perfect sense. Take care and thanks for naming what I was experiencing!
It’s a real thing!! I’m glad I was able to name it for you. IsA we get our energy back sooooooooon